The Issue
Women have been speaking up globally, and more importantly, locally, about the fear they live in and what they go through for decades. The government has declared gender-based violence a national state of emergency. All the concern has been raised, and next to nothing has been done about it.
The state has not taken responsibility and, frankly, we don't believe it's women who ought to take responsibility for this. We do not condemn men, but we condemn predatory men, and we believe it is time that men take responsibility for other men. Predators get away with it because they are allowed to, because good men don't speak up in the face of evil
Stand Up Men was founded after I saw the aftermath of a woman being dragged off into the dark at a music festival. For the rest of the festival, I paid attention to how all the women at the festival were acting. Any time I walked past a woman, I was being sized up. She was working out if I could be trusted. I noticed countless incidents where men were making women feel uncomfortable (there's a big difference between flirting and preying). I told men off, and I learned what it was like as a woman to be gaslit for saying something: "What are you talking about?", "I'm not doing anything." Men who I believed to be safe were showing their true colours as I turned my back.
These predators act at night, when the dancefloor is fuelled by drugs and when they have much less chance of being caught. Ever wondered why dancefloors are made up predominantly of men at night? Festivals are supposed to be a safe place, a place to play and be free. Everyone should have that right. Women should have the right to walk safely in the streets.
In summary women don't know what a safe man looks like and they don't know who they can trust when they are in danger.
The state has not taken responsibility and, frankly, we don't believe it's women who ought to take responsibility for this. We do not condemn men, but we condemn predatory men, and we believe it is time that men take responsibility for other men. Predators get away with it because they are allowed to, because good men don't speak up in the face of evil
Stand Up Men was founded after I saw the aftermath of a woman being dragged off into the dark at a music festival. For the rest of the festival, I paid attention to how all the women at the festival were acting. Any time I walked past a woman, I was being sized up. She was working out if I could be trusted. I noticed countless incidents where men were making women feel uncomfortable (there's a big difference between flirting and preying). I told men off, and I learned what it was like as a woman to be gaslit for saying something: "What are you talking about?", "I'm not doing anything." Men who I believed to be safe were showing their true colours as I turned my back.
These predators act at night, when the dancefloor is fuelled by drugs and when they have much less chance of being caught. Ever wondered why dancefloors are made up predominantly of men at night? Festivals are supposed to be a safe place, a place to play and be free. Everyone should have that right. Women should have the right to walk safely in the streets.
In summary women don't know what a safe man looks like and they don't know who they can trust when they are in danger.
Our Aim
We hope to make it easier for women to identify places they know they can go to when they don't feel safe, a place they can
go when they know their concerns will be taken seriously.
We also aim to inspire men to take responsibility for other men. I have personally been guilty of saying "but it's not me or the men I know". If we don't take responsibility, who will? Not the government, not the police and not security.
We hope that this project gets friends, girlfriends and sisters to push other men in their lives to take more responsibility for them and the women around them.
We're starting with festivals, but ultimately hope our impact will reach the streets of South Africa.
We also aim to inspire men to take responsibility for other men. I have personally been guilty of saying "but it's not me or the men I know". If we don't take responsibility, who will? Not the government, not the police and not security.
We hope that this project gets friends, girlfriends and sisters to push other men in their lives to take more responsibility for them and the women around them.
We're starting with festivals, but ultimately hope our impact will reach the streets of South Africa.
Our Plan
I received a lot of support when I posted about what I saw and made my intent to do something clear to a local party WhatsApp group. We raised funds
to have unique, highly identifiable armbands made that we issue to men who join Stand Up Men
For a man to join the organisation, he must have at least two women put forward a brief testimonial indicating that he is the right man for the job.
We aim to have several Stand Up Men with these armbands at Cape Town's biggest festivals this year. If a woman is feeling unsafe, she is encouraged to simply dance or stand next to a Stand Up Man, he will be a safe place. If she feels more threatened, she is encouraged to let the Stand Up Man know she feels uncomfortable, he will initially stand between her and the predator. If that fails, and he witnesses something first hand, he will gather other men in the organisation to report this to security. The more people that raise concerns, the more likely it is that the concerns will be taken seriously.
Stand Up Men are under no circumstances to ever take it upon themselves to deal with the situation violently, the organisation will be as peaceful as possible, the event and security are responsible for anything that get's out of hand.
For a man to join the organisation, he must have at least two women put forward a brief testimonial indicating that he is the right man for the job.
We aim to have several Stand Up Men with these armbands at Cape Town's biggest festivals this year. If a woman is feeling unsafe, she is encouraged to simply dance or stand next to a Stand Up Man, he will be a safe place. If she feels more threatened, she is encouraged to let the Stand Up Man know she feels uncomfortable, he will initially stand between her and the predator. If that fails, and he witnesses something first hand, he will gather other men in the organisation to report this to security. The more people that raise concerns, the more likely it is that the concerns will be taken seriously.
Stand Up Men are under no circumstances to ever take it upon themselves to deal with the situation violently, the organisation will be as peaceful as possible, the event and security are responsible for anything that get's out of hand.
Concerns Answered
Women would feel safer approaching women as a safe place, why have we chosen men?
We would absolutely encourage women to approach other women as a first line of defence. We don't believe that women need
to be a part of this organisation to take up that responsibility or that they need to be identifiable to take up that role. If someone is
more comfortable going up to a woman, then by all means, do so. If that fails, we will have Stand Up Men around to offer more
support, but the organisation will not voluntarily put more women in a potentially harmful situation.
What if a predator buys the same armband to imitate a Stand Up Man?
We specifically chose a custom design that we had custom made internationally. It was costly and it would take a
tremendous amount of effort to replicate with a bulk order. We chose a white band with a black recessed logo.
Men are not the only predators, what if a woman uses this organisation to bring harm to an innocent man?
We are not vigilantes and we are not a violent organisation. A stand up man has to witness an event first hand before he is
allowed to report it to security.
How can we be sure we can trust a man with an armband?
Our Stand Up Men require 2 women in their lives to submit a testimonial to join. We can never be completely sure, but we
have taken steps to mitigate as much risk as possible and we believe that our impact will be a resounding net positive.
Join Us
We would love to have as many willing men and women on board to help. We have two lovely women who have volunteered to
help raise awareness through social media. We have a couple of festival organisers on board
already who have given us permission to be on site, but we're looking to get all of them onboard at some point, if you could help
with that, please get in contact. If you can think of any other ways you could be of service, please get in touch below.
If you're a man wanting to join, please send us a mail below.
If you're a man wanting to join, please send us a mail below.
Get in Touch